girlie jones (girliejones) wrote,

Week 1

So it’s the weekend after my first week of … not going to a day job. Technically, I’m not working/studying yet but I’ve been trying to get work done where I can. I’ve not been well, and that’s dragging on so I’ve been still struggling with lack of energy. And normally I can at least work on the laptop or read or even craft but at the moment, I just have No Energy. I don’t like it but fighting it or pushing through it doesn’t seem to be working. At the moment, I’m just having to reduce my expectations of what I can get done in a day. But I Don’t. Like. It.

Some interesting things I’m observing. It’s going to take a while to rebuild my hard edge between the week and the weekend. This morning I just proceeded with my usual routine – wake up, turn on the computer, check for email and just dive in to tasks that need to be done. And then I pulled back a bit to think about what a weekend is and why I have chosen a new path for myself. One of the reasons of which was to get back my weekend. And I thought about how nice it would be to start a new quilt project or something. And just do that for all day. And then I watched the Lizzie Bennet Diaries for a while before heading out to catch up with a friend. And then run some TPP chores. But the thought was there. And tomorrow is another day.

During the week, I realised that I’ve entered another world. I wanted to pick up the printed copies of A TRIFLE DEAD from the printer and be home before noon. I had not driven my car for 6 weeks so no surprises that the battery was dead. So C called the RAC before he left and the guy came at about 7am. He jump started my car, warned me it might not hold the charge and I left it running for about 15 minutes before I turned it off and did a few more things before heading off for the day. Whereupon I discovered that the car again did not start. So I called the RAC and the same guy came back and laughed and then replaced my battery. And then I was on my way.

I decided to fill up the car on the way and was struck by how calm and not busy the station was. I headed up the freeway, mostly after all the traffic and I picked up the books after 9 and headed home. I decided to do a food shop before getting home and again, I noticed how calm it all was. Lots of car spaces and not busy in the shops. Not a long waiting line at the cashier, no one really in my way.

And I realised something – I’m operating my life now in that other parallel world – where the whole working day is available to me to do things in. No squooshing things into my lunch half hour or the last hour before things close after work, with every other frantic and stressed out 9 to 5 er squeezing things in. I didn’t have to rush up to pick up the books by 9.15 am. I had all day to do it. And I don’t have to be stressed all the time about when I will be able to make phonecalls or appointments or get to places before they close. I realised that I need to breathe out and slow down a bit. I have the time now.

Mirrored from Champagne and Socks.

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