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12WBT PreSeason Task: Say it Out Loud

Willow

Tomorrow is the beginning of the new round of the 12 Week Body Transformation program and I’ve signed up again. I’m doing so under medical supervision and with a promise on a handshake that I made with my midwife (and then signed off by my OB) that I not put on any weight in this pregnancy. It’s a pretty daunting thought. Don’t pregnant women *have* to put on weight? Aren’t you supposed to be a whale? Aren’t you eating for 2 etc?

Many years ago now, when I was having an anxiety meltdown, Tansy said to me – you have to work out *how* you can do [particular thing I wanted to do but had decided I could not, due to OCD] and figure out all the things you need to set in place to make that ok. What she was saying to me, and what she’s said many many times since is – figure out and set goals for things you have control over. It’s not reasonable to say “my goal is to win [X] award or publish [so and so] or create a viable business” but it *is* reasonable to set high standards for the fiction you buy and your editorial processes in order to publish the best work you can possibly publish. *That* is something you can control. And it turns out, *that* is also something you can be proud of. The rest, you can’t control so what is the use in stressing about it?  I’ve taken this advice and I’ve clung to it. When I start to freak out about something, I look at what I *can* do about it and I focus on that. If noone is buying any of my books this week, I look at what I’ve personally done to promote them and what I could be doing. And I do that.

So in the face of all the media hysteria that gets thrown at you about leaving having babies too late, I looked at what I could do, given that I can’t halt time. I looked at the factors that were within my control – I lost 15kg. I ate better, consistently. I reduced my intake of alcohol. I exercised. I didn’t take up smoking. I don’t know whether these made a difference but I do know that they gave me things I could focus on, healthy things that would improve my quality of life, even if that’s the only benefit I got.

And now here I am. 37. Pregnant. And getting bombarded with all kinds of other scary risk factors and statistics. Having a higher BMI increases the risk of complications later on in pregnancy. And given my family history of diabetes. And my own potential health complications. The best thing I can do is be healthy in this pregnancy. I believe my midwife called it ‘body sculpting” – I guess whereby the sculpture I produce at the end will be a baby? I sorta feel bad that said baby will have been made out of ice cream, chocolate and gummy bears. But probably that’s just the funny things my brain does to random shit I hear.

There’s no doubt that eating well will help me feel better and make the best baby I can make. It’s been rough so far as I have had no appetite at all, felt sick pretty much most of the time, and can’t stand the taste of water. This has meant I’ve mostly eaten glutinous carbs which have also made me feel sick due to Crohn’s stuff. I don’t see how you are supposed to only eat 200 extra calories when pregnant yet also stave off morning sickness by never having an empty stomach. How does that even freaking work? Carrots don’t quite seem to cut through that empty growling abyss in the pit of my stomach. And with my heartburn issues, there’s a whole bunch of food that I used to be able to eat that I now cannot. And so, being a vegetarian with gluten and lactose intolerances now having to avoid anything acidic … you see why toast with honey is the option, right?

Anyway. Here’s to morning sickness abating (any day soon!) and moving on to that whole extra energy thing I hear is supposed to kick in (any day soon!). I’m signing up to the next 12WBT with the goal of not putting on any weight and of getting fitter in preparation for this whole labour thing I’m trying not to hear so much about. Mostly I’m looking forward to someone else thinking through the balanced diet thing so that I start to feel better. (Incidentally, the 12WBT has a pregnancy plan option which adds in the extra calories, gives a range of meal options with pregnancy safe foods and pregnancy workouts).

So that’s me telling you the goal, as per pre season task 4. I’ll probably check in once a week on this. I start tomorrow.

Mirrored from Champagne and Socks.


Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
benpayne
May. 12th, 2013 06:23 am (UTC)
Good luck!
girliejones
May. 13th, 2013 11:04 am (UTC)
Thanks!
dragonsally
May. 12th, 2013 06:28 am (UTC)
You know what has always annoyed me about the whole "you've left it too late" argument? Before effective birth control women were giving birth until menopause. Look at Pete - his mum was in her late 40's when she had him with no trouble I might add.

I do hope your morning sickness settles soon.
girliejones
May. 13th, 2013 11:06 am (UTC)
I've been stressing about whether it would be possible for quite some time only to fall very quickly. My GP was quite shocked.

Thanks re morning sickness, I'm hoping so too!
grouchiegrrl
May. 12th, 2013 03:14 pm (UTC)
I lost weight during pregnancy. Both times. Lots actually. The first 20 weeks were chock full of people telling me how fabulous I was looking and what was my secret (very appropriate). GOBSMACKED them when they found out.

It isn't impossible to do, and as you point out, the healthier you are during pregnancy the better. King Edward actually has a program for obese pregnant women where they are helping them lose weight during pregnancy in a healthy way. When my doctor stopped me running I rented an elliptical trainer (she had said the jumping up and down was the problem with running - your feet never leave the surface of an elliptical trainer). I went skiing. When the relaxin actually kicked in I kept swimming so that I was still moving. But I did move to the indoor pool and went very slowly and gently so I didn't dislocate anything. My neighbour (who I swim with and have the same ethos about swimming) went with me in the last month and nearly drowned he was laughing at me so much the first time.

I found eating well was actually easier because I had no interest in food. I enjoyed food when I ate it, I just had no sense of hunger or preferences. So I ate by time instead. You know, it is 8am I need to eat food. Healthy food for fuel.

But I also didn't have your food issues. I was eating protein + vegies + legumes. That was how I kept enough food without od-ing on calories. But I don't know how that works for you, and I was used to the 4 hour body food.
girliejones
May. 13th, 2013 11:10 am (UTC)
I'm totally doing the eat by numbers thing - mostly, "oh I'm starting to feel sick again, must be time for more food" which is such a weird way to live. Why can't biology have evolved so you get *hungry* when it's time to frigging eat???

I've been given the ok for running "your body will figure out when it's time to stop" she said - everything will get too big, apparently. I do look forward to that, not.

I'm exactly the same with eating - completely uninterested til its in front of me and the first few mouthfuls and then "oh, this is delicious" and then uninterested again when it's done. It's been good in that I have lost my sweet tooth too - which is *really* weird.
grouchiegrrl
May. 13th, 2013 12:10 pm (UTC)
You might find that your body gets too sort of elastic in the joints before you get too big. I found that very weird. There is an evolutionary stuff up. Why all your joints, not just the ones you need for birth need to get squishy is anyones guess.

Honestly though, it is worth it.
rabbit1080
May. 13th, 2013 03:08 pm (UTC)
I can't tell the difference between feeling "my abs are very tired and sore cos I did loads of crunches yesterday" and "I'm really outrageously hungry." No idea how I'd cope if I ever became pregnant, which is v unlikely.

It sounds like you have a very practical approach to looking after yourself, in any case. As often happens :)
clairemckenna
May. 13th, 2013 10:58 am (UTC)
Yeah, I was pregnant at 38, so I know how you feel! I found that the labour came on so suddenly I think it was more mental strength (which I was so lacking! How was it possible to intellectualise the pain? Like a nighttime calf cramp but in your ENTIRE TORSO!) I ended up getting a ceasarian, which king of knocks you about for a few days - I was in on the Monday and out on the Thursday with high strength painkllers

I found I was very stiff and sore for several months afterwards, but I did lose a lot of weight initially.

At the risk of TMI, it you have to do the c-section route, start drinking the prune/pear juice straight away, otherwise the drugs will cause a "second labour" 5 days later, I kid you not!
girliejones
May. 13th, 2013 11:04 am (UTC)
I had read that piece of TMI information just today! I will hope to remember it should I go that route!

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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