October 13th, 2009

Willow

less fun than I thought it would be

So on my list of things to do was to visit the new Ikea store. I hadn't seen the new one yet and I had a bunch of things I've been meaning to buy for some time. I needed a new CD Tower so that was my main goal but lots of other things were on the list.

I like that it's no longer on Scarb Bch Rd which really sucked the fun out of going - the whole getting there and lack of parking etc. I enjoyed wandering around the showroom and imagining how I could decorate my house if I wanted to - I kinda like all those warm tones with vases and boxes and books and things. I smugly sauntered past bickering couples and realised there is a plus to being single - not having to hear that complaining and taking immovable positions on stupid things like cutlery inserts. That, I do not miss and you don't notice how much that constantly grates on your nerves till you don't have it day in and day out. Eventually all the people - noon on Tuesday! - started to irritate me.

But I did take the chance to do all the random household shopping I haven't done in ages - things that I never got round to replacing after the split with the ex. I dunno, stuff like a bin for the study, a colander, random stuff that you forget you're missing til you go for it. In some ways it felt empowering to finally be getting all this stuff, like a final moving on from that household and a cementing of this one.

I also got an espresso pot for my stove - looking forward to trying that out!

And then I got to the Help Yourself section and my experience went pretty rapidly downhill from there. I had the wrong trolley to pick up the flatpack box - but where would I put all the random stuff in my trolley - like glassware and I dunno what? And then the box I needed was on the shelf above and I had to struggle to pull it out and then figure out how to get it to the checkout. I ended up resting it on top of my trolley and it was pretty precarious and awkward. Then I was in the queue and I felt so rotten - the people behind me were clearly inconvenienced by the fact that I had lots of little items in my trolley. Like I was holding up their day. And I could feel their eyes studying me - as though they could tell I was a "newly" single woman, setting up a new house.

And then you have to take your trolley down an escalator - I have a fear of those things since my last trolley did not lock in at the Galleria and ... it was hideous. And then you have to leave your trolley and go get your car to load up your stuff - another thing that sucks if you're by yourself. You're clearly supposed to have a person with you to mind your trolley whilst you go get your car - everyone else did.

So, in all, I felt pretty shitty leaving the store. It was the first time I've felt really horrible being single and shopping alone. I didn't get all the things I wanted - couldn't find bedside lamps that I liked. I want a pair and to not have the study light I have now. But commitments to lighting kinda felt too big a step for me right now. So did commitments to footstools and I want throw pillows for sitting on the floor in my tv room, for when there are lots of people in that room. Baby steps, I guess. I also fell in love with a framed picture of NYC but it was like enormous! And I didn't really have anyway to put it.

Next step now is to unpack all the stuff and organise the office, which is what a lot of what I bought was for.

I did though have my first Auntie moment! I might have bought (the first) something for the baby just because it was hilarious and cute. Ahem.