The ex came in and sat and chatted, kinda, before he left with the dog. He told me he was robbed the other night - doing something I have for years now told him not to do .. cause you'll get robbed. He has changed cars. He's hanging out with other women - and he says "a friend" when he tells me and I was like, "dude, I know it's a woman when you say that" and he went on to reassure me nothing was happening but I was like "I don't care", and honestly I don't. As he was leaving I said "have a good time on your trip", he leaves next Tues and he says "you don't think we'll speak before then?" and I reply, "dude I'm still waiting for the meal you said we would go on after Christmas, so no I don't think you'll call me". And he looked sheepish and said, "oh yeah."
I remember how angry I was at the beginning of the month when he promised me that we would go out. I didn't believe him and he was all reassuring that we would. There I am, not caring that it hasn't happened, not angry about it at least, but more just pointing out that this is what I think of him. And I'm sure the expression on my face said it all.
I don't care that he is hanging out with other women. I wish he would treat me as if I was more important to him than he does, but I'm not more important to him than the way he treats me. I'm glad to no longer be worried that we might get robbed cause he leaves doors open to let the dog out and goes back to sleep. I'm glad to no longer feel like I am on shifting sands cause he is constantly upgrading all his belongings. And hanging out rafted up to two other boats is not my idea of a fun way to spend my long weekend. I'm not worried about the girl thing in truth, cause I think most women would be less tolerant than I was with him. And I think that's why he will come back - not cause he is going to choose me but because it will be hard to find someone else.
On days other than today, this would all probably make me a bit sad. But today I am pragmatic and moved on and hopeful about my own future where someone else awaits me.